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Love, a basis for our existence. Whom or what one loves, depends on an individual. This is my story of love.

I love some and I love something. The ones I love, mostly know about it. But I also love something fiercely. Running. It’s a new found love and it’s as true as a true love’s kiss.

About two years ago I was thrown into a challenge. A challenge to run Hiranandani Thane Half Marathon 2014. It doesn’t sound as ridiculous now as it sounded to me then. How is one supposed to even run a kilometre let alone 21? I was unsure, scared and almost to the point of hysteria. I was into sports when I was in school and I had run track for fun but long distance running was never even thought of. In this case just to jump into something so enduring was beyond my belief.

I admire my husband’s resolve to push me and prepare me for the run. That year I successfully ran my first ever half marathon.

Challenges excite me. The first half marathon was completed and I was beyond belief in love. My new found love for running. I did run SCMM 2015 and Hiranandani Thane Half Marathon 2015 after that. My sense of achievement was blooming.

But life is a game. It has rules. You begin playing by its rules and you get a feeling that everything is under your control, when the rules change. Only thing in your control then is to be flummoxed.

My story of not qualifying for the SCMM 2016 is no different. All this while the time limit to qualify for the half marathon was 3 hrs for ladies and all of a sudden one day I got to know that for 2016 the limit is lowered to 2.45 hrs. Boom! I was thoroughly in a soup. None of my eligible year’s timings fit into it.

I was devastated but I didn’t give up. With work, life and everything taking a toll on me, I still planned to attempt the 10km runs to qualify the criteria. But guess luck was having its fair share of laughs. I missed the qualifying mark in the first 10K run I ran by 2.42 mins. Heart broken does not really sum up my state. But by that time I still had that little sliver of hope within.

Failure is never easy; you either soar high or get gutted by it’s gravity. No matter which side you are on, you certainly are affected by it. The failure to cross that finish line with a victory brought my spirits on the line, waiting to just cross over and get crushed. But guess I am not that easy to accept loss.

I decided to test myself by attempting to run a second 10km run. I don’t put everything in fate’s hand or blame the luck. But I think this time fate rolled it’s dice and I was on the losing end yet again. By this time my spirits weren’t ‘on’ the line, they had already crossed it and gotten crushed, for I missed the qualifying mark in this run by good 6mins.

I convinced myself that this isn’t my year or rather the failures seem like a premonition that the year 2016 isn’t my Run year. But life gives you chances and hints and I got my hint when I read that there was still a bleak chance of being on that start line by penning all these miseries down. Yes these are my miseries, my failures and I am not ashamed of it but I am trying my best to learn from it.

Everyone deserves one more chance, isn’t it? At least that’s what we believe in. Certainly I am no different in thinking otherwise. I run passionately. That’s something which is ‘my thing’. But of course I would always be utterly grateful to my better half to push me into it, but nevertheless this is my run, my purpose. And trust me it’s no good feeling when you see your own purpose being defeated by no one but you.

I want a chance to be on that start line, a chance to resurrect, a chance to serve my purpose. I have let myself down twice when I didn’t reach the goal. But no more. I want this chance like a drowning person gasping for breath.

My love demands attention and I have promised to give the time and attention it deserves.

There are downsides to every peaks. In case if I don’t get that much needed chance on participating in SCMM 2016 I am certain I would be very sad. But who said love is an easy affair. The calendar will turn its pages. A new year would come. And I would put everything in reviving my lost case.

Having said it all, the year 2016 I guess has a special plan for me for I have missed the deadline of posting this article for a running spot. I may or may not have gotten a chance. But let me promise that I will put every ounce of strength within to work and set new standards for myself. I will run like I have never run before and make sure I am not in this situation again.

Happy running to you all.

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